A Memoir’s Satisfying Conclusion: Enduring Love
Asked by Grace Klaassen on October 27, 2020
Six years ago, my husband was trampled, killed in the cattle pen by a steer. Miraculously, God allowed him to begin breathing when I told him to do so.
Many friends have asked me to write a memoir/study of how we coped, and how God's grace carried us through the terrors of hallucinations, memory loss, learning to walk, etc. And keeping our farm going.
Jerry B Jenkins helped with a title: "Grace Is More Than My Name." With that name, I need to finish well!
I rejoined the guild and found the wonderful program called Dreamer to Author with Jerry. How I have learned!
Jerry, you say the theme of a memoir should be "who I am today despite what we went through, and how we got here." I've struggled until lately. What was worth it all?
Sunday, God woke me with this thought. Before I could change my mind, I told Him, "I thank You, God, for this accident, for I would never have learned the depth of Your grace nor unconditional marital love without it." How do I explain this?
Jerry's Answer
You don't explain it, Grace. You just lay it out there. It doesn't need explanation. It'll either resonate with the reader, or it won't. I'm guessing it will.
BTW, you may have a problem with some Inspirational publishers saying your husband was killed. Many are pretty strict about the Scriptural admonition that it's appointed unto a man once to die ... And the medical definition of death is the irreversible cessation of vital signs.
Now that said, I'd be the last person to try to change your view of what happened that day. He was certainly dead in your eyes, and clearly he was not breathing. Had you not somehow willed him to breathe, he may have indeed died. But whether he was clinically dead or not, that's not your story. As you cogently say, it's what you learned from this near tragedy that is the guts of your story.
All the best with it.